Not sure why I feel the need to plan out everything and have everything figured out. I'm struggling with the next step (and swamped with everything in my life right now). I know our family is not quite complete and having a sibling for litte A is in the cards. Just not yet. I know it in my heart...
However, I got a little urked at Alex the other day. We spent the day together (which we never get to do anymore). We spent the afternoon running around doing errands and taking Anderson to his 9 month doctor's visit. Everything was going so well.
While we were driving I started rambling something to the effect...if I were to get pregnant now I don't think I could handle it...I would freak out, with having to take care of Anderson, working full time and having to deal with health issues (like diabities, giving myself insulin, blood pressure, being old)...ugh, it would be too much! I just don't think I could handle it.
"Don't you think so Alex?"
Alex says, "YES".
Nice.
Nice support.
I told him that was not the answer I wanted to hear. I would much rather here "we can get through anything as long as we are a team". A little support would be nice.
Then as I fermented the anger inside me, I thought it over (in silence in the car). Had he said what I think I would have liked to hear (see above)...I would have been like...you only say that because you wouldn't be the one pregnant dealing with the health issues...it's easy for you to say to be a "team" because you don't have to be the one pregnant!!
So Alex would have lost that conversation either way.
Still confused. But a little less urked. :)
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